- You start sneezing from all the dust when you open the code.
- It would be a valuable find on Antiques Roadshow or American Pickers.
- The Smithsonian wants to put it on display.
- Your community would actually look better planned without a zoning ordinance or map.
- Off-street parking requirements are based on wagon measurements (unless you are in Amish country).
- Setbacks are measured in rods instead of feet.
- Corporations are actually NOT referred to as persons.
- You have one zoning district.
- The pages are turning yellow.
- It refers to “old folks homes” and “homes for the aged.”
- It refers solely to “churches” instead of “places of worship” or “religious institutions.”
- The “fencing” regulations sound more like rules for a competitive Olympic sport
rather than a zoning standard.
- “Drive-thrus/throughs” are referred to as only “drive-ins.” There is a difference!
- There are only six terms defined in your definition section.
- There is enough land zoned industrial to rebuild Gary or Pittsburgh.
- There is no mention whatsoever of bicycles or pedestrians.
- Your ordinance refers to a “notions store.” What the heck is that…some place you go to shop when you have a notion to do so?
- Mixed uses are prohibited.
- Your code is titled the “Euclidean Zoning Ordinance of _______” (fill in the blank).
- The sign standards resemble something more appropriate for Las Vegas.
- The number of variances heard in a given year exceeds the total number of pages in the code book.
- The ordinance it written in Sanskrit on papyrus.
- Carbon paper is stuck between the pages.
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