Your community is a retirement haven when…

A little more satirical fun.  Your community is a retirement haven when…

  • Gray hair is considered way cool.
  • Golf courses exceed parks.
  • Prune juice is the best-selling soft drink.
  • It’s retail economy depends on the sale of Depends.



  • Everyone has heard of (and uses) Geritol.
  • Incontinence is NOT a geographic term.
  • “Old folks home” and “home for the aged” are banned terms in the zoning code.
  • Municipal bonds are more popular than James Bond.
  • To be a “senior” in high school or college takes on a whole new meaning.
  • The world shuffleboard championships are held there.



  • Bike lanes are replaced by scooter lanes.
  • The Scooter Store has a brick and mortar location there.
  • Scooter drag races are a favorite sport.
  • Orthotics are the only shoes available for sale.
  • Movie theaters come equipped with hearing aids.
  • Sadly, the obituary section is the largest part of the newspaper.
  • Designer canes are an important fashion statement.
  • Happy hour is from 3-4 pm with dinner promptly at 4:30 pm.
  • Golf carts are driven on the streets and sidewalks.
  • B-I-N-G-O is its name-O!
  • Children are not to be seen or heard.
  • Wrinkles are more common than zits.
  • Age is simply a state of mind.
This entry was posted in Active transportation, ageism, cities, commerce, Cuisine, culture, economic development, entertainment, fitness, Food, fun, geography, health, Health care, historic preservation, history, Housing, humanity, infrastructure, land use, placemaking, planning, politics, product design, satire, spatial design, technology, transportation, urban planning, zoning and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to Your community is a retirement haven when…

  1. Brian O Donchu says:

    Ha ha ha ….oh God….the FUTURE!




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